I've learned quite a few things over the course of this and previous pregnancies; some of which I've shared in previous posts, but will repeat here nonetheless.
1. I REALLY love being pregnant at home. I had focused on the napping at whim and vomiting in one's own toilet, but I just realized another benefit today: not dealing with co-workers' annoying comments and questions. No, it's not decaf and YES, I can have it. How is it any of your business whether or not we were "trying?" Yes, we have a name picked out, but I'm not going to tell you what it is because I couldn't give less of a shit whether you like it or not or used to know someone with the same name who you now hate.
2. When I did have to deal with co-workers' asinine questions, at least they were "normal." I was just reading my bulletin board for moms due in December. One woman's co-worker asked her if she thought her baby could sense electromagnetic energy. WTF?? I responded that she should've answered, "Of course. That's why I keep my stomach covered in aluminum foil. Duh!" (Note: Aluminum foil is also useful for keeping out unwanted alien transmissions and government satellite surveillance).
3. I so didn't have to gain so much weight the first time around. Granted, it came off quickly, but this time I've been more mindful about what and how much I've been eating and have actually lost 4 to 5 lbs over the past 6 mos. I'm not dieting, by any means, just not stuffing my face. My docs are OK with it, and so am I.
4. Maternity clothes for us plus-sized gals have gotten much cuter, cheaper and easier to find over the past 5 years. Hallelujah!! God bless Old Navy and Target!
5. Tylenol PM is the BOMB! I slept so soundly last night I had to get up at 7:00 am this morning. I couldn't FORCE myself back to sleep. For the first time in months, I saw the sunrise coming through the big bay window in our living room. It was glorious. Then I made coffee and--no--it wasn't decaf. I really wish you'd quit asking me that!
6. I actually know enough now, through all our pregnancy ups and downs, to be helpful to other pregnant women. An example: on my bulletin board for plus-sized moms, one woman was freaking out that she's already popped at 8 wks (this is her 2nd pregnancy). I assured her that this was entirely normal due to the abdominal muscles and ligaments being all loosey-goosey from the first time around and implored her to stop trying to stuff herself into her pre-pregnancy clothes. No sense being uncomfortable and self-conscious. On top of that, I found myself doling out advice on the most belly-friendly methods of engaging in...ahem... "relations," shall we say.
7. My subconscious loooooooooooooves to undermine my confidence. I keep having recurring dreams about being unprepared. In one, I'm still in school and I realize when the bell rings after the class I'm in that either a)I have no idea what class is next, or b) I've been forgetting to go to a certain class all semester long and show up for the first time just before finals. In another, I suddenly find myself in the backseat of an empty car zooming down the street and I have to hop in the front and grab the wheel just in time to avoid a crash. Last night, I dreamt that my GPS was broken and I had no idea how to get home. The most obvious are the dreams where I suddenly realize I have a baby that's been home for several days before I finally remember to feed and change him.
8. Being pregnant during the summer sucks ass. I'm not usually a sweaty person, but I can't avoid it this summer. I venture outdoors as little as possible while the sun's out. Going outdoors requires putting on clothes and shoes. I'd much rather stay indoors and expose as much bare skin as possible to the A/C. I've even been taking coldish showers, which is something I couldn't bear to do before.
9. My husband only cares that I shave my armpits. Everything else can grow wild and woolly. Bless his heart. It's just so much bother.
10. Every time the baby kicks, I'm forced to stop and contemplate what a wacky, random, magical place the universe is. When I have these moments I hear David Byrne asking, "How did I get here?" in my head. No idea, Dave, but you sure do make cool bike racks.
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5 comments:
Here's a lost baby story for you:
My daughter has a comforter known as Baby. We have managed to establish that Baby's gender is female and we quite often dress Baby up in various accoutrements (quite a feat if you know what she looks like - http://www.cuski.co.uk/ No.3 wasn't interested in hers, so we're being cheap and giving it to no. 4!). We have 3 babies floating about - Original Baby, who is not as good as Favoured Baby and then we have Pristine Baby for when Original and Favoured Baby are MIA, which Favoured Baby currently is.
ANYWAY. Original Baby has been doing the job and also went MIA recently. Daughter insisted she was at kindy, so I rang to check. The Principal went outside and yelled "Was Baby left here?" which seriously alarmed a visiting prospective parent who thought someone had actually left their baby behind...
On the subject of tummies popping out, I've never been able to hide my pregnancies for the full 12 weeks because I always get big quickly and have got bigger round the belly each time - so much for buying your normal size in maternity wear. Pah! I'm as big now as some women at term. I put on 3 stone in my first pregnancy and nowhere near as much in my second, even though I hadn't lost it all after 5 months and no.2 was over a pound and a half lighter than no.1, so there's also that to take into consideration.
It'll be interesting to see how close their weight estimates are to his size at birth - they only have about a 50% accuracy... ;o)
Love your first pic - makes our girl look even more obvious when you see what we would have seen otherwise. My one and only son was a bit of a whopper too - could tell his gender at 12 weeks.
Spot the Jewish mothers - all that's important is how well endowed he is!!!
Oh yes and I know I still have to reply to your email. Apologies - I am very, very bad with mail these days. Should be winging your way soon!
He's likely to be short like his mom and dad, so an impressive member will only help him with the ladies!
That's probably 3rd on the Jewish Mom List of Important Things. More important would be where he goes to college and whether he marries a nice Jewish girl or, at the very least, converts a nice shiksa like his daddy did :p
Lame comment, but: I really liked this post.
Your "glow" is coming across. (Even in your [well-deserved] snark at ex-co-workers.)
Hugs.
k
Crap. I also wanted to say:
a)Yes, summer pregnancy sucks re:heat. (My) Ethan being born in August was a punishment for a sweaty gal like me. OTOH, being big in the thick of an icy winter sucks for an already balanced challenged chick like me. (With E. we actually had an ice storm in late April, and having just lost my center of balance due to belly, I slipped and hit my head on the corner of the garage at the farm. Blacked out for a minute. Scary. And a bit retarded.)
AND
B) Byrne's racks are cool--esp. like the one for the Bonwit ladies, lol. He is aging well. He's kind of geek hot now.
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