Damn You, Jeopardy!!!

I am an unabashed Jeopardy! junkie. I have a series recording set so that I don't miss one single episode. I may go days without watching it only to sit down to a 2 hr Jeopardy! marathon to catch up.

A while back, I signed up via the Web site to be notified via e-mail when the next online qualifying test would be held. I received an e-mail today. I opened it hoping it would be "the one." Nope. It was just a note to inform me that there would be an entire category dedicated to AMC's hit series (and one of my very favorite shows) Mad Men on Friday. Are they deliberately taunting me??? I would mop the floor with my opponents' nerdy asses in that category.

I kick ass in most categories except sports and U.S. Presidents (For any president pre-JFK, I have a mental block as to who served when). But Mad Men????? That's just mean.

I'm actually terrified at the prospect of ever being on Jeopardy! I won't be horribly traumatized if I lose, only if I lose badly. I don't want to be one of those yutzes whose final score at the conclusion of Double Jeopardy! is less than 5K. That's just pathetic. It's one thing to go into Final Jeopardy! with a nice wad, bet it all and lose everything. There's a kind of nobility in that. Finishing Double Jeoaprdy! with a low score--or worse!!--with a negative score so you can't even participate in Final Jeopardy! would be humiliating. I don't think the latter would happen to me, however.

It would be nice to win just one game and win big enough to pay off my student loan, buy a hybrid mommy car, or sock it away for a down payment on a house to be bought when things mellow out (30 yr. fixed, of course!).

Until such time, I will keep watching religiously. Ethan watches with me. We're a great pair. Between the 2 of us we can annihilate most categories. He still needs to learn the "NO TALKING DURING THE CLUES!!!!" rule. You should see him jump when I yell at him. I feel bad immediately afterwards, but COME ON!!! I totally would've gotten that answer if he hadn't derailed my concentration.

That's the problem, I can't make myself realize that I'm not actually competing from my couch. You should hear the awful things I call contestants when they give a stupid answer. I don't know how I'd be able to control my trash talking on set. Maybe I shouldn't. Maybe I should just let 'er rip. I'd become so popular that the ratings would skyrocket and they'd start stacking the categories in my favor so that I'd stick around as long as possible. I would never ask Jeopardy! to compromise its integrity in such a manner, but if they were to do it without my knowledge then I guess that'd be OK :).