Here There Be Monsters

I just saw the largest rodent-like creature in the backyard from the bathroom window. I'm still not sure that I've identified it correctly. At first, I thought it was just a big pregnant possum. It had grey fur, but not the skinny pink tail or pointy face (mind you, I'm on the 2nd floor so I'm viewing this thing from a distance).

My next thought was that it might be a beaver, it was so huge, but the fur was the wrong color and the tail was all wrong again. Then I thought "badger," but it didn't have the black markings or triangular head and I have no idea if they're indigenous to this area.

I decided the only thing it could be was a ground hog, but it's the biggest goddamn ground hog I've ever seen. If I had to guess, I'd say it was easily 15 to 20 lbs. I only wish the dogs could've seen it. They'd have gone ape shit. It lumbered slowly and fatly into the bushes before I could snap a pic, and there's no way in hell I'm going down there looking for it!!!