Mommy & Daddy Dance

As usual, my friends, not a hell of a lot has happened in the Sincoff universe in the past 6 weeks or so. Only two highlights to mention, and only one of them significant.

On Saturday, February 12th, Mr. E and I went for a couples massage at the lovely Oasis on Park Day Spa in Manhattan. It was a two hour indulgence with the first hour being instructional and the second a straight-up massage. Ethan has finally learned how to rub my shoulders without making me scream in agony. $300 well spent, I'd say.

That following Thursday we met with our genetic counselor and learned that it's very unlikely that any future children will have the same health problems Sam had. We were planning on trying again this year, but after that good news we're anxious to start right away.

I immediately went to babycenter.com and used their ovulation calculator to figure out my "fertile days" for the rest of the calendar year. Needless to say, we won't be available for socializing from March 5th thru the 10th. And, in the event we don't knock one out of the park on our first at bat, we also won't be receiving visitors from April 2nd thru the 7th.

I'm interested to see how long it takes us to get pregnant when we're trying. Considering the circumstances of the last time, it should be pretty fast. Ethan's got that super-tenacious Jew sperm--those kids didn't survive almost 6,000 years of oppression, genocide, natural AND deity-wrought disasters by chance, ya know. It's somethin' in the genes, baby.

Readers should be forewarned that this will most likely be, from here on out, a conception/pregnancy blog. I will not go into disgustingly graphic details, however. Have no fear of that. No detailed discussions of the consistency of my vaginal mucus or how many times the hubby and I copulated or in what positions. I'm sure my postings will be more psychological and emotional in nature.

So, in my first official pre-conception post let me just say that I'm very excited about the next few months. I'm looking forward to (mush alert, kids) the experience of making love to another person with the intention of creating a baby. Never done that one! I'm looking forward to the moment when we finally see those two pink lines on the pee-pee stick and everything in between. I'm even looking forward to the emotional support and coddling I'll get from Ethan in the event the test is negative and we have to do it all over again the next month.

We'll see how this goes. I'm not 100% sure how comfortable I am putting such personal stuff out there, but I'll give it my best shot. And it's not like there are more than, say, TWO of you who ever read this anyway, and you'd be the two people I'd be telling all this to regardless.

I couldn't sign off without a reference to the pets, so humor me one short Fred story, because this is too darling not to share. I had a miserable stomach virus from this past Saturday thru Tuesday. Monday night I was lying on the couch watching TV, my stomach feeling like it had been stomped by an elephant. Just then Fred jumps up on the couch with his toy monkey in his mouth, places it on my pillow and then curls up and goes to sleep by my knees. I assumed he wanted to play, but he showed no interest. I really think he gave me Monkey to make me feel better. What else could one possibly infer? Pets are far more intuitive than people give them credit for. Freddie Sincoff is the handsomest dog and sweetest boy in the whole wide world--and he loves his mama :).

V

Ethan's bugging me to update again, so I decided to appease him. As usual, not much has happened since I last checked in. Well, a few things happened, but nothing earthshattering.

Ethan's phat neighborhoodie finally arrived. It is baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadass, if I do say so myself. I intend to photograph him in it for their photo gallery and will post the picture here when I do. Check out the site if you haven't before. The merchandise is top notch and the staff are very friendly--I got a handwritten, hipster thank you for my order included in the box. It's little touches like that that will make my buy from them again.

As E mentioned on his blog, we've been on a health kick for the past week and a half. In our defense, we started right after Xmas unlike all these schmucks with their well-meaning New Year's resolutions. We've finally gotten a clue and realized that the only real, permanent way to lose weight is to eat less and exercise more. Not that we ate like hungry, hungry hippos before, but we were certainly as lethargic as the aforementioned beasts. It's going well so far--we've both lost about 2 1/2 lbs. Go, go Superjews!

It's a cold, rainy day in JC, but thanks to my new diet, exercise regimen and annoyingly positive outlook on life, I'm actually looking forward to going out tonight. We're meeting friends at the Film Forum in the Village to see "Hitler's Hit Parade"--sort of a montage of German pop culture from the Nazi era including home movies of der Fuehrer shot by civilians, anti-semitic cartoons, the whole megillah as my adopted people would say. I'm very jazzed. Jazzed for the movie, jazzed to be going into the city for the first time in about 2 weeks, jazzed to see people with whom I neither live nor work. I'm just super stoked, obviously. Can you tell?

I just scrolled up to re-read what I'd written so far and was sort of struck by the "nothing earthshattering" comment. Obviously I'm referring to my own life there, and not the horrible and ongoing tragedy in East Asia. Not to get heavy here, but please consider donating to the charity of your choice to help out. Good hearted Americans have donated over $3 billion so far. I like to think that the bulk of that $3 billion came from lefties who were mortified by Bush's initial stinginess, but I'm sure just as many people on the right dug deep as well, and for that I thank them. Once again, a horrible tragedy seems to be the only thing that can bring these two warring factions together. Fucking beautiful.

Ethan's cleaning the kitchen all by himself and I feel like I should be helping out, so I'll sign off for now.

(This post is dedicated to the memory of Jerry Orbach, Law and Order's beloved Det. Lennie Briscoe).

V

I'm so goddamn boring...

I haven't had a SINGLE exciting or interesting thing to post to this blog in 45 days. I was too emotionally distraught after the election to say anything coherent about it, so I chose not to. Other than that, I've been so busy at work that I'm too tired to even look at the computer when I get home, so I don't read nearly as much news as I used to and therefore am not able to comment on current events in any meaningful way.

Ethan's been hounding me to update this blog, but I honestly have had bugger all to say. Before I started this blog, I was of a mind that regular people shouldn't have them. Who wants to read their mundane, banal bullshit? Four months later I still feel that way, but I'm not a quitter so I have to stick with it out of spite.

Obviously not blogging, I've been spending my time doing things I genuinely enjoy: reading, snuggling on the couch with Ethan and the dogs, cooking. I love winter because I can enjoy those things without feeling guilty about not going out more. It's like winter gives us a meteorological excuse to be a hermit.

If it were up to me, people would hibernate in winter. I really have no desire to go out from around mid-December to mid-March. I don't think it's SAD (as in Seasonal Affective Disorder, not pitiful), because I'm really happy being indoors. I'm not moping, I have a blast! And it seems completely natural to me, because by the time spring rolls around I've had enough solitude and can't wait to get outdoors again, allergies be damned.

Unfortunately, I'm married to a very social type who goes stir crazy if we stay in even three nights in a row. He literally gets "antsy." Okay, so not literally, because that would mean he had actual ants in his pants and I never, ever want to witness that. He gets squeamish and girly at the sight of one bug. I can't imagine if he were crawling with hundreds of them. In his defense, he's very manly in a lot of ways, too :).

So I do have ONE interesting thing to report. Last night we went into the city for dinner and a movie with Susannah (That's not the interesting thing). After the film we went to Veselka on 9th and 2nd Ave. for coffee and dessert. Halfway through my carrot cake I look to my left (we had a killer table right next to the restrooms...yak!) and there's Rufus Wainwright coming out of the loo (That's the interesting part). I had to look at him a second until my brain figured out if he was someone I went to school with, a friend of a friend or a celebrity, but the penny finally dropped and I realized it was him. I'm a big fan. I didn't talk to him. I'm not a celebrity approacher. I can't make an ass out of myself like that.

That made my night. It was like God had decided to reward me for getting my fat ass off the couch for a change. I love New York.

I'm off for some husband and canine snuggles. Take care and I promise to check in more often. Matter of fact, I just might make that my New Year's Resolution along with drinking 8 glasses of water a day and cleaning once a week and paying bills on time, and....ha ha ha! I kill myself.

Love,
Veekee

Oops, almost forgot...

Let me not retire from blogging for the evening without taking this opportunity to address my husband of 366 days directly:

Ethan,

Despite all the shitty, shitty, shitty things that happened to us this year, I'm still insanely glad that I married you and loopy in love. You're still the funniest, most interesting, sharp-tongued sonofabitch I have ever met. In a year full of heartache and tough breaks, it was comforting to know that our relationship was the one thing I never had to worry about. Here's hoping 2005 is a little easier on us--and that we're a little easier on ourselves and each other.

Happy anniversary, bubbe.

XOXOXOXOXOX

V

32 Days to a New America...

or the end of the world. After tonight's debate, the former doesn't seem so impossible.

It's very late and I'm very tired. Been working hard at the new job, so I haven't had the time or energy to post my daily political diatribes to this here blog o' mine, but I just had to say how impressed I was with Kerry tonight. He was concise, clear and to the point. I especially liked how he mimicked Bush's strategy of staying on message and reiterating the key points he wanted to get out to the american people tonight.

I daresay he was even better than the president at this tactic. He was able to skillfully weave his talking points into the question at hand whereas Bush seemed to invoke his when he couldn't come up with a satisfactory answer, whether his particular mantra of choice made sense in context or not.

And despite the Repubs downplaying Bush's debating abilities and playing up Kerry's in the hopes that Bush would appear successful so long as he didn't make a complete ass of himself, I think he still came out looking like he hasn't the slightest clue what he's talking about. He sounded like a trained parrot, frankly.

Let's just hope the remaining debates go as well for Johnny Boy as this one tonight.

Big ups to Jon Stewart (my other Jewish boyfriend--the other being Marc Maron) for not being a pussy while interviewing Giuliani and actually calling him on that bullshit statement of his about Kerry flip flopping on whether or not Saddam was a threat. He's such a fucking whore. The only way his post-debate commentary could have possibly been more vile would be if he were actually wiping W's seed off his chin while he was talking to Tom Brokaw.

Okay, that was a little too vicious even for me. I'd best be off to bed.

Take care, kiddies.

XO

Thank God for low centers of gravity. Sometimes being short has its perks. Susannah, Ethan and I defying hurricane-like winds to complete the 2004 Walk for PKD on 9/18/04.  

Neither Rain Nor Sleet...

This past Saturday was not the most ideal day to schlep around Liberty State Park with the remains of hurricane Frances or Ivan or whichever wreaking havoc on the weather, but we managed to complete the 5k Walk for PKD nonetheless. Fear not, generous donors--your contributions did not go to waste. In fact, the NJ chapter more than raised its goal of $42,000, making the walk a complete and utter success. We were all glad to be a part of it!

We woke up at 8:00 am to heavy rains and flooding, but, thankfully, the skies cleared in time for the actual walk. The wind, however, was another story. For the first 2.5k it was our friend, pushing us along our way. The way back was brutal. I felt like a mime, except with real wind. So I guess that's not really miming, but you get my meaning...

Who knew walking 5k was such a workout? We were useless the rest of the day, relaxing and watching movies. Sunday we slept until 3:00 pm, did laundry and then visited the Shingletons for a bit.

My first two days at the new job have gone relatively smoothly. Right now I'm in charge of booking CME presentations on Stress Urinary Incontinence (check out the "clinical tools" on www.stressui.org for a good giggle. I highly recommend the pelvic floor muscle assessment and physical exam tipsheet--I can laugh, I've had Stress UI). I have 4 all but booked out of 9. Apparently I'm doing better than my two counterparts working on the same project, so I may need to reign it in so as to a) not piss them off and b) keep my bosses from expecting so much effort on a regular basis. At least I know I'm making a decent impression.

I barely have a cube. Since I'm on the end I have no back wall, so my back is completely exposed. I hate that. I have a Wild Bill Hickock complex, I always like to have my back to a wall so I can survey the entire room. I feel unprotected. I also startle easily, so maybe they'll move me to a better cube after 2 or 3 occurrences of someone coming up behind me and me screaming "JESUS!!!!" at the top of my lungs.

In other news: This Friday at sundown begins Yom Kippur, the Jewish day of atonement and (sigh...) fasting. We'll see how good we do on the second half of that--the atoning we have down pat. It's the not-stuffing-our-faces-for-24-hours that needs some work.

I'm off to bed. The only reason I'm still up this late is because I passed out on the couch from 8:30-11:00 pm. Getting up an extra half hour early really f's up your whole groove, man.

Good Yuntiff!

Technically, Rosh Hashanah ended at sundown, but l'shanah tovah to any readers of the Jewish persuasion.

Tonight we went to Ethan's Uncle Joe and Aunt Eileen's in Brooklyn for Rosh Hashanah dinner. There were about 16 Jews gossiping and stuffing their faces with gefilte fish (I tried it for the first time ever. Not a fan, frankly), brisket, turkey, kasha varnishkas, potatoes, etc. etc. We had a blast. It was my first opportunity to see how a normal(ish) Reform Jewish family spends the holidays so I know what to do when we have our own family. I'll be leaving out the gefilte fish, however.

As Ethan mentioned on his blog, we were at their house on Tuesday as well--which was another first for me, my first live boxing match. I was excited to go as we're all big fans of the main eventer Dimitriy "Star of David" Salita. He's an up and coming Jewish boxer. Cute kid originally from Odessa, Ukraine now fighting out of Brooklyn. As Ethan says, he's a great technical fighter, but it's difficult to tell if he has any power punches.

I love watching him because, as an observant orthodox Jew, he often comes out to the ring with his spiritual advisor/rabbi with stars of David containing his initials emblazoned on his robe and trunks. This night the rabbi didn't accompany him to the ring, but in his stead were what can only be called a "hardcore klezmer band." Maybe even "hardcore surf klezmer." Imagine Korn, The Beach Boys and The Klezmatics rolled into one. He really likes to push the Jewish angle. It amuses me greatly. If you go to his website, www.dsalita.com, and go to the photo gallery, among the photos of him training and beating the crap out of his opponents, there's one of him in his prayer shawl strapping on his tefillin.

I must say that watching boxing live is a lot different than watching on TV. Watching on TV gives you that extra layer of detachment that keeps you from really being affected by the violence happening in the ring. I was actually a little squeamish at first, witnessing it live. One of the Irish brothers who fought, whom Ethan mentioned on his post, was knocked out cold by a Puerto Rican fighter. I missed the punch, but when I turned back to the ring he was lying face down and his legs were twitching. For one second I was afraid he'd be a vegetable and I'd be traumatized for life--never being able to watch boxing ever again. Alas, he was ok.

As E also mentioned, this took place in very Russian Brighton Beach. Salita Being Ukrainian and Jewish, there were tons of Russians and Jews (and Russian Jews, I'm sure) in the audience. They were all rabid fans--they have their own cheers and everything. I was shocked to see so many orthodox (and I'm talking ORTHODOX, not this modern orthodox or metrodox bullshit) Jews were there. I thought the orthodox were strictly opposed to violence. I guess I was wrong. Maybe that's just the Chasidim. Or maybe there's some technical reason that it's ok that Dimitriy boxes that makes it ok for other orthodox Jews to watch. I have no idea.

Anyhoo, I'm sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepy. Will write more when I actually have something interesting to say.

Happy Birthday, Mr. Sincoff...

I've been too busy to post the last week, but had to take a second today to say Happy Birthday to my dearest husband! He is 34 VERY SEXY years old today.

I've been telling him that all week, but he didn't believe me until his 32 year old best friend's 23 year old babe of a girlfriend said, "Ethan, you're looking JACKED!" Now his already huge pumpkinhead is even more inflated. Thanks, Kate--you bought me at least a day or two of not having to listen to him groan about his weight or how old he is! Why he doesn't believe his own wife is beyond me, however.

Anyhoo, happiest of birthdays, toots! Many thanks to your parents for having sex 34 years and 7 mos. ago. Where would I be if they hadn't??? I'd probably still be a single gentile living in DC. Perish the thought...

Business Ethics and Other Oxymorons...

So I got the job at the new joint. They made me an offer yesterday and I handed in my letter of resignation. Not a huge salary jump to start, but it's a lateral move after all. Their yearly raises are roughly 1 1/2 to 2 times larger than my current company's and we get a year-end bonus, so I figured it's worthwhile. On top of that, my friend and everyone I talked to there assures me that they're quick to promote people from within and recognize and reward hard work--none of which my current company does.

I've sat here for two years watching my company hemorrhage good people to competing companies who pay more competitively. Those who remain do so with little hope of promotion or a significant pay raise. My boss actually tried to convince me when I met with her yesterday that there was room for advancement here. There are three people ahead of me for promotion here looking to fill one management position--and guess what?? The company is looking to the outside to fill that position, completely overlooking its hardworking employees who are more than qualified and who have been slugging away at their current positions for at least two years now (some have been with the company for as many as five).

Management cannot seem to put two and two together. I don't think they're stupid, I just think their hands are tied by the parent company, Thomson. Thomson seems to be very big on downsizing and promotion freezes. They certainly don't care about employee retention. It's a real shame.

Still, I'll miss a lot of great people I've gotten to know here. I'll have to try headhunting them as the opportunity arises like my friend did me. I have no compunctions about stealing good people from a company that doesn't appreciate them.

In other news: I've decided Jenna Bush is REALLY weird looking. She looks like the worst possible combo of her mother, her father and a hideous elf. I get the feeling that of the two siblings, she's the "W" and Barbara is the "Jeb." She seems to have that same mischievous/clueless appeal her father has. I haven't heard her speak yet, so I've no idea if she also has her father's oratorical eloquence as well.

OK, so the heading is "....Oxymorons." What's this about the Bush campaing returning to its 2000 era compassionate conservatism spiel?? What's so compassionate about the 2004 Republican platform? There's certainly no compassion for gays or young pregnant women in crisis or public schools or....Bah!

Dick Cheney's snarling face will be all over the tube tonight, but I don't think I'll watch it. I'm surprised that kid managed to get so close to him at the convention. I'd be afraid he'd bite my hand off. If he were a dog, he'd be muzzled. Kudos to the Veep, however, for finally coming out in support of his gay daughter, no matter how politically motivated it may be.

John Kerry isn't getting another red cent from me...

He's raised over $230 million so far--more than any other democrat ever. WHAT IS HE DOING WITH IT????

He has two months to bring out the big guns and spend the bulk of the cash his supporters worked so hard to raise for him and he'd better do it.

I'm an eternal optimist, so I still think he's just picking his moment very carefully. We shall see. The suspense is killing me.

I work hard (sometimes) for my money and I want to know it's being spent wisely and for its intended purpose--to defeat Bush.

I'm sure I don't need to point out...

That the content of the previous posting constitutes a


FLIP FLOP


on the part of the Bush administration--though apparently he denied that they had altered their view on this matter even though it's well documented that they have. Idiot.

Hell Freezes Over (While the Polar Ice Caps Melt)

In a new report to congress, Bush and his administration have finally admitted that carbon dioxide and other heat-trapping gases "are the only likely explanation for global warming over the last three decades."

In a separate statement Bush conceded that the earth was, indeed, spherical and that "maybe there's somethin' to this whole evolution monkey business after all."

In the News

The number of Americans living in poverty has increased by 1.3 million in the past year and the number of uninsured by 1.4 million. Chew on that for a while. Still turning that corner, I guess.

On a lighter note, the banana split turned 100 yrs. old yesterday! Happy Birthday to one of America's favorite desserts. I think the Bush administration should hand out free banana splits to the 36 million Americans living in poverty. It might make them feel better about being so poor. I know when I'm sad about something, a banana split sure turns my frown upside down.

The Waiting is the Hardest Part

About 4 to 6 weeks ago I interviewed with a company similar to my current one. You can check out their website, though it's not even remotely interesting to anyone outside the medical education and pharmaceutical communities (www. cognimed.net).

I interviewed with two different people and it seemed to go really well--and I don't say that lightly. I'm very clueless when it comes to sensing whether others like me and even I could tell it went well. So I was surprised when I didn't here back and chalked it up to me wanting too much money. Lo and behold, last week I get a call out of the blue that they want me to return to interview with the company's president who happens to be a member of the tribe (though I didn't use that to my advantage:)). So I meet with him and one other individual this afternoon and it goes really well again--the president says "You'll definitely here from us within a week" and the other dude says he thinks I'd be a "good fit" and that the other people I'd met with had all good stuff to say about me.

So I'm thinking it's pretty much in the bag (knocking on wood as I type this) and now I just need to sit tight and wait for an offer. Hopefully it'll be significantly more than what I'm making now (I'd even settle for 5k more at this point).

Anyhoo, keep your fingers crossed for me. We can use a lucky break after the year we've had. And keep your fingers crossed for Ethan, too. Sitting around the house with only animals for company is making him a little kookoo for cocoa puffs. If we could ever use a dose of good karma, it's now.

In other news:

1. We've started going back to the gym after months of lethargy and girth expansion. I haven't walked without a limp in about a week. Still, it's a good hurt.

2. Is John Kerry TRYING to lose the election? He really needs to come out with a stronger rebuttal to the Swift Boat Veterans for Diabolical Deception than what he's put out so far. I appreciate that he's trying to stay positive and not sink to their level, but one can only turn the other cheek so many times, and that would be once. When you run out of cheeks, it's time for the gloves to come off and my money's on Kerry in a bare knuckle brawl against Georgie any day.

I'm counting on the K-Man to whoop the "Speaker of Very Short Sentences" (as Garrison Keillor referred to him) in the upcoming debates. So long as he doesn't show obvious signs of frustration and exasperation like Gore, I think it's a lock. A girl can dream....

Which is exactly what I'm off to do. It's late and I can't go kamikaze at the old job until the offer letter for the new one is signed (assuming it's coming, that is--don't want to jinx anything).

Night night. Sleep tight. Don't let the Republicans bite.

Little Things Make Me Happy

I finally got around to buying myself a radio to put in my cube so I can listen to Air America while I work. Now I can listen to Al Franken and my new Jewish boyfriend, Marc Maron, at work as well as at home and in the car. Good stuff.

Have you heard the laughably propagandistic commercials from the Saudi govt. re: the 9/11 commission? Pathetic. That's it. I have nothing insightful to say about it. The news is pretty thin today, sadly.

My Dogs Hate Me

For making them wear embarrassing shit like this. It wasn't enough that they had to endure going to the groomer's today, but we got home to find that my order from Glamour Dog had arrived.

What you can't see in the picture is that Lulu's hoodie sweatshirt has a flower and the phrase "Daddy's Girl" embroidered on it. Freddie has one in blue with a dog and the words "Mommy's Boy" on it. To my knowledge, he is still under the couch, humiliated, but hasn't actually tried to chew it off yet. Maybe if he comes out I can get a decent picture of him in it.

Lulu fantasizing about the night I sleep soundly enough that she can gnaw all the way through my jugular with her little chiclet teeth without waking me up.  

Sorry, Charley

As the two (?) of you who occasionally read this know, Ethan is in Florida looking after his father who just had surgery. He's slated to return home tomorrow afternoon. For two weeks I have been looking forward to tomorrow, so if Hurricane Charley thinks he's going to throw a monkey wrench in my plans (or an uprooted palm tree), he's got another think comin'.

Neither Hell nor hurricane hath wrath like a woman in the throes of PMS who hasn't been in close proximity to a man in a fortnight. I'm already mere millimeters from insanity at this point, Charley. Don't push me. You still have a chance to veer off at the last minute and go whirling out into the Atlantic. You might want to consider that if you know what's good for you.

Aside: You know someone's egotistical when they threaten the weather.

In Other News: A 480 lb. woman in Florida died as rescue workers tried to remove her from her couch to which she had grown fast after six years of not moving from it. See article here. Her skin had literally become one with the fabric of the couch. My question is, how long do you have to stay put before you start to grow fast? In six years of couch sitting, assuming she wasn't the full 480 pounds at the beginning, wouldn't you change position occasionally? Maybe get up to fluff the cushions? Or go to the bathroom for crying out loud? Why didn't the man living with her seek help? Did she ever ask for it? I feel so terrible for her.

Ethan, if I ever reach 480 lbs. and can no longer remove myself from the futon please, please, PLEASE promise me you'll get help. I can't imagine being so fat that I'm unable to even get up to get more food, though sometimes I feel like I'm well on my way. Imagine being such a couch potato that you actually put down roots!

That's it for now kids. Time to work.

That's more like it

Big ups to France for arresting the culprits so quickly. Way to put your argent where your bouche is, for a change. I retract my "France, schmance" comment for now. On peut lire l'article ici.